


love slipped through our fingers

by brookethenerd



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2018-03-13 05:27:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3369512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brookethenerd/pseuds/brookethenerd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Carmilla turned Laura, they thought theyd be together forever. But life doesnt always work the way we want, and sometimes love slips through our fingers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	love slipped through our fingers

**Author's Note:**

> idea for this AU to my best friend Grayson who rocks

It was okay at first. It really was.  
It took Laura a few years to really be okay with the blood drinking thing, but eventually she accepted it.  
It was the greatest solution to a seemingly hopeless problem. Laura was edging towards 27, and Carmilla was in the same place, and in a drunken stupor Carmilla had agreed to Laura’s pleas.  
She listened to her scream for days as the change took place, felt as the soft warm skin that coated Laura to turn cold, just like hers. She regretted it for every single second of every single day. She knew she had killed her. She had messed up. She had killed the love of her very-long-life.  
Then Laura woke up. She sat straight up in bed, yawned, and complained about her throat hurting.  
“Laura?” Carmilla had asked, watching her warily from the doorway.  
“Yeah?” She’d answered, pressing a hand to her head.  
“I feel weird.” Laura complained, getting out of the bed. Carmilla’s stomach dropped, and she clung to the doorway.  
“You-you don’t remember?”  
“Remember what?” Laura asked, furrowing her brows.  
“Laura.” Carmilla whispered, covering her mouth with her hand.  
“You begged me. You begged me and finally I couldn’t take it anymore and I-“  
Laura gasped, looking down at her wrist, at the healed bite marks.  
“You turned me?”  
“Yes.” Carmilla said, feeling the breath surge out of her lungs.  
Laura’s hand flew up to her throat, and ran down her face, feeling for any differences.  
“I’m a…?”  
“Yeah.” Carmilla breathed, still frozen in the doorway.  
“Oh my god.”  
“Are you-are you angry?” Carmilla questioned, trying to gauge Laura’s reaction.  
“Angry? No! No I’m not angry Carm!” Laura said, a laugh bubbling up from her chest.  
She ran for Carmilla, launching into her arms, throwing her arms around her neck.  
“Were going to be together forever, just like we wanted.” She whispered.  
There was a sinking feeling in Carmilla’s gut, but after a moment it disappeared, and she hugged Laura tight. They would be together. Forever.  
-  
“It’s going to be gross, isn’t it?” Laura asked, wrinkling her nose.  
Carmilla leaned against the brick alley, her arms crossed.  
“Not gonna lie, cupcake.” Carmilla shrugged, watching as Laura softly approached the unconscious woman who lay on the ground.  
“You have to be careful. You’ll want to clean her dry, but you can’t. You can let her live.” Carmilla warned, nodding at Laura.  
Laura sent her a worried look, and Carmilla smiled.  
“You’ll be fine.”  
Laura nodded, and knelt down beside the woman. She brought her lips to her neck, and bit.  
After a moment’s hesitation, Laura’s hands pulled the woman up, clutching her closer, so she had better access.  
“Laura, not too much.” She said, stepping away from the wall.  
Laura paid no mind, acting as if she hadn’t heard, not letting go.  
“Laura!” She snapped, jolting Laura. She dropped the woman, lurching up, and backing against the wall. She wiped blood from her lips, and looked down at her hands in shock.  
“Carm-“A sob escaped her lips, and she held her hands out in front of her.  
“It’s alright. It’s alright.” Carmilla repeated, taking Laura’s bloody fingers in her own.  
“I almost killed her.” Laura whispered, not seeming to register Carmilla’s presence.  
“You didn’t.” Carmilla assured her.  
“I would have.”  
“No, you wouldn’t have.”  
“Yes I-  
“Laura!” She barked, getting her attention, pulling her from her daze. “I know you. You wouldn’t have.”  
Laura didn’t answer.  
“It gets easier. I promise.” Carmilla said, smiling lightly.  
“Okay.”  
“Can we go home?” Laura asked.  
“Yeah. Sure.” Carmilla replied, casting another worried glance before turning and walking away with Laura beside her.  
-  
Carmilla lay next to Laura in the bed of their small loft, twirling her honey colored hair in her fingers.  
“Carm, I wanna go to sleep.” Laura murmured, turning away from her.  
Carmilla pressed a kiss to her girlfriends shoulder, sliding her tank top down.  
Laura turned over, her eyes brightening. Carmilla smirked, batting her eyelashes mischievously.  
“I hate you.” Laura said, slipping her ankles around Carmilla’s.  
“Mhmmm.” Carmilla mumbled in reply. She brought Laura’s lips to her, lightly flicking her tongue along her bottom lip. Laura giggled in reply, wrapping her legs around Carmilla’s waist, pulling her tight to her chest.  
She deepened their kiss, letting their tongues meet in the middle. She wasted no time pulling Laura’s tank over her head, slinging it onto the floor. Laura kicked the covers onto the floor, rolling on top of Carmilla, dragging her lips from her neck to her chest.  
She pushed down Carmilla’s bra, trailing her tongue along her nipple, feeling Carmilla tense beneath her. She groaned in response, earning a grin from Laura. She reached underneath Carmilla, tugging her shirt up and unlatching her bra. Those ended up on the floor too, along with Laura’s bra.  
Carmilla’s fingers drifted down to the waistband of Laura’s panties, and slid in them without a moment’s hesitation.  
Laura’s soft moan was hushed by Carmilla’s lips on hers, tongue swirling along hers.  
Carmilla’s fingers slowly made their way to the entrance, and when two slipped inside, Laura’s hips bucked up.  
“Carmilla-“She gasped, tilting her head back. After a moment there, her fingers left, pulling the underwear off completely.  
Carmilla dragged her tongue down Laura’s stomach, stopping at the base of her stomach, light fingers brushing along her hips. She spread Laura’s legs, moving her mouth to the base of her thigh.  
“Don’t be such a-“Laura gasped as Carmilla moved closer, “fucking tease.”  
Carmilla’s eyes flicked up to hers, lips grazing her hip bones thighs. Laura’s hands moved to Carmilla’s hair, and she let out staggering breaths.  
“Please.” She whispered as Carmilla paused.  
“What was that?” Carmilla asked, her voice husky.  
She trailed a tongue lightly along the outside, and one of Laura’s hands moved the clutch the bed sheets.  
“Please.” Laura cried, her head tipping back once more.  
“Wanna know the perks of being dead?” Carmilla questioned, tongue lightly brushing the spot Laura wanted.  
“Carmilla-“  
“We won’t get tired.”  
Then her tongue pressed against Laura’s clit, flicking against it, and Laura cried out.  
Her hips jutted to rub against her mouth, and Carmilla reached for her them, forcing them down.  
“No.” She mumbled, bringing her lips to Laura again.  
Her tongue worked with fervor, and in less than a minute Laura was trembling, about to tip over the edge.  
Carmilla licked a straight line from bottom to top, tasting everything, and Laura pushed Carmilla’s head with her hands, letting out load moans.  
“Fuck.” She yelled as she came. Carmilla licked along it one more time, slowly moving up her stomach, not bothering to wipe her mouth before kissing Laura on the mouth.  
-  
The vampire stamina that they both possess makes fucking much more pleasurable.  
Laura came 3 times, and Carmilla 4.  
“You’re getting pretty good at that.” Carmilla purred, Laura curled up against her, their bed smelling of sweat and sex.  
“I learned from the best.” Laura replied.  
“I hope you’re talking about me.”  
“Someone’s full of themselves.”  
Carmilla smiled, pressing her face into Laura’s soft shoulder.  
“You’re okay, right?” Carmilla asked, pulling herself up onto one elbow. Laura turned towards her, head propped on her arm.  
“What do you mean?”  
“With the whole blood thing…”  
“I’ll get used to it. I’ll have to.” Laura said, looking down at the sheets.  
Carmilla didn’t know how to respond, so she just pulled Laura into her arms.  
She pressed a kiss to her head, and tried to sleep.  
-  
“I can’t do this anymore.” Laura said, standing at the doorway to the living room. Carmilla looked up from her painting, a smile lifting up her face.  
“What, you tired of the paint smell?” Carmilla teased.  
“No, not that.” Laura said softly, not meeting her eyes.  
Carmilla set her paintbrush down, and walked over to Laura.  
“What’s going on?” She asked.  
“It’s been ten years, and I can’t do it anymore.”  
“Do what?” Carmilla asked, that same sinking feeling in her gut from so long ago returning.  
“This. I can’t do this.” Laura gestured to the two of them, and Carmilla swallowed.  
“Why not?”  
“You ended my life, Carmilla.” Laura said, shutting her eyes.  
Carmilla didn’t know how to answer, so she just brought her hands together, holding them in front of her.  
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. But I can’t stay here with you and pretend like its okay, because it’s not.”  
“You wanted me to.” Carmilla whispered, low enough Laura could barely hear.  
“What?”  
“I said, you wanted me to.” Carmilla said, clenching her teeth.  
“You begged me. For months. I couldn’t take it anymore, okay? I thought it was what you wanted. It sure as hell wasn’t what I wanted, but I always do what you want, don’t it?” She hissed, watching Laura’s face fall. Laura put herself back together after a second, and lifted her chin. She looked composed, except for the tear that had escaped and was sliding down her cheek.  
“I didn’t really want that. I thought I did.”  
“That would have been nice to know before.” Carmilla snapped.  
“I love you, Carm.”  
Carmilla didn’t answer, just looked at the ground.  
“So this is it then?” She asked, looking up as Laura opened the door to their-now her-loft.  
“I’m sorry.” Laura said, looking at her sadly.  
“Just go.”  
“I truly am-“  
“Go, Laura.” Carmilla said, all trace of emotion gone.  
She closed her eyes, but heard the door shut, closing the door on the last twenty years of her life.  
-  
Carmilla meets a vampire named Ell three years after Laura leaves. She has white blonde hair that is cut in a harsh bob, and brown eyes that remind her of Laura.  
She reminds Carmilla of Laura, too.  
She has her kindness, and her fire.  
But she is not Laura. She is Ell, and she is bright, and excited, and everything Laura used to be.  
Before Carmilla ruined her.  
Ell is better for her. They travel the world together, and spend 70 years happy and in love.  
And sure, Carmilla misses Laura. But the Laura she fell in love with is long gone, replaced by a ghost. She hasn’t seen her since the day she left, and part of her is glad.  
“Have you seen this?” Ell asks, perched on the countertop, her laptop in her lap.  
“What?” Carmilla asks, moving beside her, leaning into her shoulder.  
The headline reads mass murder in the city. The descriptions match that of a vampire killing, and Ell and Carmilla exchange a look.  
“Is it one of us?” Ell asks.  
“I think so.”  
“Who is stupid enough to kill? I thought that tradition was thrown out the window forever ago.” She complains.  
Carmilla pulls the laptop away, placing it on the counter. She scrolls down and finds the suspect list. There is a picture of someone spotted fleeing the crime scene, and it freezes Carmilla.  
A girl with honey brown hair and brown eyes, blood dripping down her lips, running around a corner. Her eyes still look the same as they did 70 years ago. Everything looks the same.  
“Oh my god.” She gasps, backing away from the computer.  
“What? Carm?” Ell asks, looking back and forth between her and the laptop.  
Ell swivels the laptop towards her, eyebrows furrowing at the picture.  
“You know her?”  
“It’s Laura.” Carmilla whispers, meeting Ells gaze.  
“Oh.” Ell replies, looking back at the picture.  
“You’re going to go after her, aren’t you?” Ell asks, rubbing the hem of her t shirt like she does when she’s nervous.  
“I have to.”  
“No you don’t.”  
“Ell…” Carmilla says, brushing a hand along the girl’s cheek.  
“I made her. I have to do something.”  
Ell looks like she is going to protest, but nods.  
“Be careful.” Is all she says, and Carmilla presses a kiss to her forehead.  
“I’ll be back soon.”  
With that she leaves their apartment, and goes to find the person she lost.  
-  
She finds her after three days of scouring, in an abandoned hotel. She is curled up on a mattress on the floor, her clothes filthy. She opens her eyes when Carmilla enters, and her eyes light up.  
“Carmilla!” She squeals, getting to her feet. She jolts forward, grabbing Carmilla in a hug.  
“I missed you!”  
Carmilla doesn’t move, standing still as a board as Laura clings on.  
“Laura-“She says awkwardly, pulling the girl off of her.  
“I’m so glad to see you! I knew you’d find me! And finally, after all this time, you did!”  
Laura grins widely, and there is something wrong with her eyes.  
“What are you doing here?” Carmilla asks, looking around at the dirty room.  
“I’ve been here for years now. It’s pretty comfy.” Laura says, nodding her head.  
She reminds Carmilla of a child, not of the 27 year old woman she was frozen at.  
“Now that you’re here it can go back to normal! And we can-“  
“Are you killing people, Laura?”  
Laura furrows her brows, cocking her head.  
“What?”  
“Are you killing people?”  
Laura’s face settles into a frown.  
“Aren’t you happy to see me?” Laura asks.  
And suddenly, Carmilla realizes that Laura is long gone. The day she turned her Laura started to lose it, and now the girl standing in front of her is a psychotic child.  
“Answer my question.” Carmilla says.  
Laura bites her lip, showing red stained teeth.  
“Yeah. I was never very good at self-control. And who cares? They’ll have more babies. It’s okay if I do it.” Laura says, shrugging her shoulders.  
“Oh, Laura.” Carmilla says, rubbing a hand over her face.  
“Did you come to bring me home?” Laura asks.  
“Yes. I did.” Carmilla says, smiling softly.  
Laura’s face lights up in a grin, and she reaches for Carmilla’s hand.  
Carmilla takes it reluctantly, and tries not to flinch as she feels the blood clumps coating it.  
“I’m ready.” Laura says. Carmilla smiles again, hoping she’s convincing.  
As she walks Laura out, her stomach churns. She leads her around to the back of the hotel, stopping at the wall. She presses Laura up to the plaster, and reaches for the knife in her back pocket.  
“I love you.” Laura whispers, tucking a piece of hair behind Carmilla’s ear.  
“And I love you.” Carmilla replies.  
“I’m sorry, Laura. But I can’t let you keep doing this.” Carmilla says, tears falling down her cheeks.  
Laura cocks her head in confusion, but it’s too late.  
Carmilla takes the knife and jabs it into Laura’s stomach. Laura looks down in shock, her mouth forming an O.  
“I thought you loved me?” She chokes, blood trailing from her mouth.  
“I do. And that’s why I have to let you go.” Carmilla tells her.  
Then she pulls out her lighter, drops it onto Laura’s body, and walks away, trying to ignore the smell of burning flesh.


End file.
